The Diary Of The Phantom Tire Buyer – Entry #23

Dear  Diary

A Web Log from A Phantom Tire Buyer with a Secret Identity

December 27, 2018

My good friend Mike at Tire Discounters and I were engaging in some friendly small talk today when he asked me what my New Year’s Resolutions were for 2019.   Fortunately, I had already considered various ways that I could be a better Phantom Tire Buyer with a secret identity.

Here’s my partial list:

  • Don’t startle people. I can patiently explain the importance of tire safety and automotive maintenance.  I don’t need to blurt it out.  Even though it is SO CRUCIAL!
  • Buy and sew on a proper fastener for my cape. The safety pin looks rather unprofessional.
  • Cultivate a sophisticated sense of humor. Oftentimes people have to explain to me when they’re engaged in light-hearted banter or joshing.
  • Get out more. Almost every Tire Discounters is surrounded by places where regular people congregate and get coffee, or shop, or go about the usual business of life.  Caveat:  when acting upon this resolution, always remember resolution #1.