The Diary Of The Phantom Tire Buyer – Entry #22

A Web Log from A Phantom Tire Buyer with a Secret Identity

December 20, 2018

Every year I struggle with the same dilemma:  what to get my friends at Tire Discounters for Christmas.  They work so hard all year keeping vehicles safe and tires aligned – what could I, a humble Phantom Tire Buyer with a secret identity, do for them to properly express my thanks?

Last year I decided to visit each store to express my gratitude personally.  Wow, what a whirlwind tour that turned out to be.  It isn’t easy visiting over 100 stores in 5 states – but I certainly met some interesting people along the way.  In one local eatery in Bardstown Kentucky, I struck up a conversation with a local gentlemen:

“Say friend,” said I, “what repast would you recommend, as I assume you’re a regular in this establishment!”  He looked me over carefully, very carefully in fact, and then declared, “I know you.  You’re that Phantom Tire Buyer guy!”

It’s always embarrassing to come face to face with what limited fame I enjoy as a result of my crusades on behalf of automotive safety, and I was formulating a modest response when the gentleman indicated that he had just remembered he had somewhere else to be.

“Did you recognize my cape and glasses,” I inquired?  But when I looked up he had already left, having hurriedly tossed his money and check on the counter.  Tell me reader, does that behavior seem somewhat quirky to you?  Because for some reason, I see it quite often.