A Web Log from A Phantom Tire Buyer with a Secret Identity
Spring is in the air dear readers, and, while I like to think of myself as a glass-half-full Phantom, to me that means the return of my arch enemies: Evil Potholes. And after this particularly brutal winter season, these tire eating, wheel bending, alignment ruining pits of doom are here in greater strength and numbers than in March’s past.
Woe betide all those poor unsuspecting drivers see what might look a harmless piece of uneven road, only to suddenly be jarred in their seat as their tires and wheels clank into the sharp rim of a gaping wound in the road. Oh, the horror.
There is good news, though, and that is that your friends at your local Tire Discounters store are standing by and ready to help. They will inspect your tires, wheels and alignment at no charge. Then if and only if a tire repair or other service is needed, ASE Certified Technicians will perform the service with unmatched skill and professionalism.
I would urge you, however, not to take matters into your own hands, as I did last year. While attempting to fill in several potholes near me, I discovered that the officials responsible for repairing our roads frown upon such amateur initiatives. They much prefer that you simply report any nefarious chasms to the proper authorities. I tried explaining to them that all was well since I AM a Phantom Tire Buyer with a secret identity. They were not swayed.